Let's see how much I can remember

Well, it's an actual think called "Chemo Brain". You forget EVERYTHING. Words you use every day, why you walked into a room, what you were talking about, that your friends are coming over to bring presents. Sigh. Let's see how much of the last few days I can remember, shall we?

Thursday (6 days post chemotherapy treatment 2) I went in for a blood test to see where I was at. I noticed some petechaei on my legs and ankles so I wasn't too encouraged, and rightfully so. I had dropped from 13,000 on Friday the 9th of July to 7,000 on Thursday the 15th. Seven thousand. That's just so low. At my last meeting with Dr. K., I told her (with Joel's support) that I would be unwilling to take any more dexamethasone steroids. The side-effects are simply too far reaching and for much too long for me to take even a "small dose", especially when the last dose I took got me up and then I plummetted in 5 whole days to 5,000 platelets. It's not worth my sanity and my family's sanity.

Dr. K then wrote me a prescription for Plaquenil, which has it's own side-effects, but they're not that much off from chemo, so whatever. The Plaquenil is to be used for a "quick fix" like this weekened while we "wait" for the chemo to start doing it's job. I'm not going to lie - Thursday was a hard day for me. I had to work pretty hard to cover the back of my head so that there were no bare spots. And then, the wind was blowing it all over the place when I was outside. I was incredible disappointed and discouraged on Thursday to hear that the Cytoxan wasn't working (so far - most treatments are 6 months long. But the doctor had said if I got to 50,000 and stayed above 50,000, that she could be convinced to stop treatment). and that I'd need to take another breakthru drug to keep me from bleeding out. Not only was I feeling like crap from the treatment, and losing my hair, but it simply was not working. Very frustrating.

I am starting to get SUPER tired, but that's Thursday in a nutshell. I was sad after the report, but today I remembered that God still cares, and knows what's going on, and the number of hairs on my head. We are blessed beyond measure, and this is just a season of life that seems to have thrown a curveball at us.